w2wlink.com TALKS

Letting Go of Limiting Beliefs

As host of the radio show "The Empowered Mother," I have the privilege of coaching moms and moms-to-be across the country. A recent session proved particularly interesting and is a wonderful example for many professional women.

Who: Kristen, a 37-year-old mother of two boys, starting her own business.

Issue: "I have so much already in my life and I am grateful. But, I’m starting my business and I want it all and I want it all right now!"

Background: Kristen has two small boys, ages two and four. She used to be the fashion director for "Cosmo Girl" magazine and has been a stay-at-home mom the past few years. Recently Kristen has been itching to start up her own business. She is enthusiastic about her business ideas but worries that she isn’t moving fast enough.

The Coaching: After hearing Kristen describe both excitement and frustration with getting her new business rolling, I asked, "How good are you with patience on a scale of one to 10?" Kristen figured she was a three or four when it came to patience.

When you experience impatience around an issue or goal, there is often a limiting belief lurking below the surface. A limiting belief can be conscious or unconscious, but can act as a brake on your momentum. Usually you need to dig around and find the limiting belief that is slowing you down and choose to replace it with an empowering belief.

Mom-preneurs are no strangers to limited beliefs – typical beliefs include, "I’ll never have time to do everything," or "Someone else has done this better," or "I don’t deserve to have it all."

As Kristen and I talked, she was able to identify the underlying limiting belief behind her impatience, "I have to have it all now because the window is closing – I don’t trust that my passion and belief will always be there." Together we created an empowering new belief simply by eliminating the word "don’t" from the last statement.

Commitment: Kristen committed to letting the new belief, "I trust that my passion and belief WILL always be there," drive her business decisions and actions over the next month.

Result: "What I loved about the coaching is that it gave me permission to go a little easier on myself  -- that it all doesn’t have to happen right now. I struggle sometimes with taking a back seat as a mother. This helps me know that my business WILL happen and that small steps are okay too."

For You: You have the responsibility and privilege to consciously choose your beliefs for your life. By staying aware of your beliefs, you can keep the ones that serve you, weed out the ones that don’t, and choose the ones that will support who you want to be. The difference between a limiting and an empowering belief is quite literally the difference between a limited and a powerful life.

Is there a limiting belief lurking in your life? See if you can replace it with something more empowering!

Written originally for w2wlink.com by Amy Kovarick.

 

How to Name Your Startup

9 Things to Consider

What's in a name? More than you think. Naming your startup can be a daunting task, especially if you want something that emulates your brand in a few succinct words. Read below for 9 tips on naming your startup, from w2wlink partner Women2.org.

Everyone can agree that there’s nothing really objectionable about calling your business ‘Bargain World’. It’s an innocuous name and most people won’t hate it. That’s the problem. If you’re going to name your startup, product or service something that people won’t hate, then you’re giving yourself an identity that they will never be able to care about, either.

Bunkum! I hear your cry what about Apple and Amazon, aren’t they just unobjectionable words too? Back in 1976 when Apple was Apple Computer, tech startups and corporations were called IBM (what does that stand for?) and Microsoft.

I bet a few people were laughing behind their hands at the idea of branding an incorporated tech company with a stripey apple. When Jeff Bezos named Amazon after one of the biggest rivers in the world in 1994, other book stores were called Borders Books and Waldenbooks. It didn’t take people long to fall in love with Amazon, which of course aspired to be the biggest, fastest, get what you want bookstore, (that had room to grow not to be just a bookstore) in the world.

Your business or product name is the hook on which you hang your story and start the conversation with customers. It’s the mechanism you give people to identify you. And when you earn their trust and loyalty it’s the way they spread the news about you. Your brand and product names are some of the most priceless assets your business can own. They should make you stand out, not fit in.

If nobody can find an objection to the brand name you choose, then you’ve probably got the wrong name. Your name should polarize people, spark their interest, and make them want to get to know more about who you are and what you do.

Here’s a simple test. If you can’t imagine someone wanting to wear your name on a t-shirt one day, then it’s probably not the right name for you now.

Things To Consider Before Naming Your Brand

To communicate the value of something you’ve created you must first understand where the value in it lies. Here are some of the things you need to consider before you get to the fun of the naming part.

 

1. Mission: What are you doing right now, today? What happens because you exist?
2. Vision: What are or will be the results and effects of what you do in the future?
3. Core Values: What are the attitudes and beliefs that shape your business culture?
4. Unique Selling Point: What’s your edge, the thing that makes you stand out?
5. Emotional Selling Point: What’s the intangible that you are you selling? Think feelings not facts, here, like connection, freedom, ego, or a sense of belonging.
6. Brand Essence: This is the core of what you do, the image it portrays and the signals it sends.
7. Tagline: One line or very short phrase that communicates everything.
8. Identity: How the consumer perceives the brand.
9. Name: The verbal hook on which all of the above hangs and is communicated, the icing on your cake. Comes in all the way down here at number nine!

 

Brand Naming Do’s and Don’ts

 

• Choose a name that is easy to pronounce and spell.
• Make sure the name you choose is legal and not owned or trademarked by another company in the same business category. Check for both domain availability and availability of your name across all social networks. NameChk is a good comprehensive tool for this. Aim for .com availability, easier said than done. Consider natural extensions to your name. “Only Human,” for example, can become onlyhumancommunications.com.
• Look for a name that won’t box you in to one category, think big, and get creative. Test-drive the name by speaking it aloud. Act out answering the phone and introducing yourself at networking events with it. Announce it to a small focus group to check that it is not ambiguous on the ear.
• Choose a name that tells a story and starts a conversation. Google is a great example of this. Don’t allow the naming process to stall your project. If you’re struggling, get professional help.

 

The Four Magic Numbers for Professional Women's Heart Health

Professional women are busy. We have lists upon lists upon lists. I have a Palm Pilot, cross referenced with my Blackberry and detailed in my Filofax (yes, very old school) for just about every task that needs to be done. Each meeting has an alarm synchronized to my watch, each deadline is highlighted in yellow and every event for my son is in iridescent blue. As professional women, this is simply part of who we are.

Get out a red pen, because there is something to add to your to do list. Every year, at least once a year, from age 20, it is time to get your cholesterol checked. You might as well make it this month. Years ago, Hallmark declared February the official Heart Month for Valentine’s Day, and now it is Heart Health Month for awareness and prevention of Women and Heart Disease.  If that reminder slipped by you this year, it is time to make a doctor’s appointment.

You need to understand your risk for heart disease and checking your cholesterol is one of the first pieces of information you need to have. It is best to check it fasting, so make an early morning appointment. There is nothing worse than going through the day on an empty stomach!

There are four major numbers you will be given, your:

1. Total cholesterol
2. LDL
3. HDL
4. Triglycerides

Total cholesterol should be less than 200, although it is not as important as its fractionations, but gives an idea of how much you are at risk.

The LDL cholesterol, otherwise known as L for lousy, or the "bad" cholesterol is associated with buildup of plaque in the arteries. The more risk factors you have for heart disease, such as family history, diabetes, smoking or high blood pressure, the lower the LDL should be. If you have blockages in the arteries, or atherosclerosis, this number should be less than 100. If not, then it should be less than 130.

The HDL, or H for happy, or "good" cholesterol, is protective to the lining of the arteries. It is the part of the cholesterol that picks up the bad stuff and shuttles it out of the arteries before it could do any damage. This, greater than 60 is very protective, and greater than 50 is pretty good.

Exercise has been shown to be a very important mechanism of increasing this cholesterol, and in fact, regular exercise sustains an increase. Estrogen also increases cholesterol, so when you are younger, you are just given lots of HDL and as you age and your estrogen decreases, so does your HDL. So, keep exercising! In fact if your HDL increases by as little at one point, there is a 3% reduction in heart attack risk.

The triglycerides are so dependent on diet that sometimes you can tell if pasta and bread are mainstays in your eating pattern, because it actually increases with consuming carbohydrates, especially the simple kind. Anything white and containing simple sugars increase the triglycerides, so when these are elevated, changing your diet is the most important thing you can do. The goal for this is less than 150.

Controversy has existed around medication and overall treatment patterns for treating cholesterol. The best thing to do is eat well and exercise and to prevent ever needing medications. As long as you have your red pen out, schedule in some time to exercise and continue to watch your diet.

As a busy professional woman, knowing your risk helps you know what you need to do for yourself. One thing we know for sure is maintaining your cholesterol needs to be part of the plan. Happy Heart Health Month!

Written originally for w2wlink.comby Dr. Suzanne Steinbaum.

 

8 Warning Signs Women Over 40 Can't Ignore

We like to think we're invincible - that if we put our head down and work hard, everything else will fade into the background. But there are some warning signs we simply can't ignore. Read on for 8 warning signs women over 40 can't ignore. 

The Symptom: Flu-Like Feelings, Including Fatigue, Nausea, Sweating and Chills
Likely Cause: Virus
Worst-Case Scenario: Heart attack
“Women tend not to have the Hollywood heart attack with significant chest pain,” says Nieca Goldberg, MD, author of Dr. Nieca Goldberg’s Complete Guide to Women’s Health. “They sometimes just feel like they’re coming down with an infection.” That could be one reason women having heart attacks take more than 11 minutes longer than men, on average, to go to the ER.

OTHER SIGNS IT MAY BE SERIOUS: Shortness of breath; dizziness; pressure, squeezing or pain in the chest; pain in the back, arm, jaw or upper abdomen.
WHEN TO ACT: If you have some of the above symptoms, call 911 and say, “I think I’m having a heart attack. I need an ambulance.” At the hospital,
the staff should do an electrocardiogram to detect whether your heart is being deprived of oxygen, a blood test to measure cardiac enzymes and proteins, an echocardiogram to see if the heart has been damaged, and possibly cardiac catheterization—inserting dye into the arteries to see them clearly with an X-ray. Getting examined quickly may save your life: It’s estimated that you have a 50 to 70 percent chance of dying if your heart attack takes place outside a hospital. Among women ages 40 to 60, heart disease is as common a killer as breast cancer, but with some precautions, you can decrease your risk. “Keep your blood pressure, cholesterol and weight under control, and exercise regularly,” Goldberg advises.

The Symptom: No Matter How Much You Sleep You Don't Feel Well-Rested
Likely Cause: The flu

Worse-Case Scenario: Sleep disorder
Don’t dismiss daily fatigue as an inevitable consequence of aging. Feeling tired is a common symptom of two of the most prevalent sleep interrupters for midlife women: sleep apnea and restless legs syndrome, a neurological disorder that causes an itchy, twitchy sensation in the legs that makes it difficult to stay still and, as a result, fall asleep. “Many people think sleep apnea only affects overweight men, but it’s nearly as common in women after menopause," says Lisa Shives, MD, of Northshore Sleep Medicine, in Evanston, Illinois. Like sleep apnea, RLS often worsens as you get older.

OTHER SIGNS IT MAY BE SERIOUS: If you’re a snorer and you wake up feeling as if you’ve been hit by a truck, chances are you have sleep apnea. The condition relaxes the muscles of the throat, making it difficult to get sufficient air, and the lack of oxygen triggers mini awakenings—sometimes hundreds of times a night. Other signs of sleep apnea: waking with a headache and sore throat; experiencing memory or concentration problems; feeling irritable or depressed. Fatigue-related symptoms such as irritability are also common with RLS.
WHEN TO ACT: If the symptoms of either disorder persist for more than a month, see your internist, who may be able to diagnose the problem based on your description. If not, she may refer you to a sleep specialist for further evaluation. Sleep apnea is treated with a continuous positive airway pressure device, a mask that fits over your nose and/or mouth during sleep and helps open airways with gentle air pressure. RLS is treated with dopamine-like drugs, but some sufferers can control symptoms by limiting caffeine, walking regularly and massaging or stretching their legs before bedtime. Practicing yoga or meditation may relieve some symptoms. Likewise, lifestyle changes may ease the effects of sleep apnea: Drop pounds if you’re overweight, avoid alcohol, quit smoking, and try to sleep on your side, a position that sometimes reduces symptoms.

The Symptom: Pain and Swelling in Your Calf
Likely Cause: Pulled muscle

Worst-Case Scenario: Blood clot in the leg
Calf pain is the most common symptom of deep vein thrombosis (DVT), a clot in a deep vein, which is a potentially fatal condition that strikes an estimated 350,000 to 600,000 people in the U.S. every year—most of them 40 and over. “The clot blocks blood flow, causing pain and swelling,” says Stephan Moll, MD, of the National Alliance for Thrombosis and Thrombophilia.

OTHER SIGNS IT MAY BE SERIOUS: Symptoms of a clot can be pronounced, with significant swelling, redness and pain, but they can also be mild and easily mistaken for a cramp. The skin may also be warm to the touch. If you’re short of breath, coughing, experiencing chest pain or having difficulty breathing, a clot may have broken free and traveled to your lungs, clogging a blood vessel there. You’re at increased risk for DVT if you’re on hormone therapy, the Pill, patch or ring; if you smoke or are pregnant; if you’ve just had surgery or have been on a plane flight or car trip longer than three hours; if you’re obese; or if you have a family history of blood clots.

WHEN TO ACT: If the symptoms come on suddenly and don’t go away in a few hours, call your doctor for a same-day appointment. If she can’t see you, go to the ER right away, especially if the swelling and pain are significant, you’re having any breathing or chest symptoms, or you have any other risk factors. “It’s better to err on the side of caution,” Moll says. “Half of people with DVT develop a blood clot in the lungs, a condition that can be fatal.” Blood clots are usually diagnosed with ultrasound and treated with intravenous blood thinners for a few days, followed by several months of medication. They can be prevented with some lifestyle changes: Maintain a healthy weight; don’t smoke; and on long trips be sure to get up and walk around.

The Symptom: A New Mole
Likely Cause: Harmless skin growth

Worse-Case Scenario: Skin Cancer
While it’s common to develop new moles before midlife, finding a new one or seeing changes in an existing mole after age 40 could be a sign of melanoma, the deadliest type of skin cancer.

OTHER SIGNS IT MAY BE SERIOUS: “If a mole—new or old—turns darker or black, becomes asymmetrical, or causes pain, itching or bleeding, you should get it checked out right away,” says Robert Brodell, MD, a dermatologist in Warren, Ohio, who is a spokesperson for the American Academy of Dermatology. The more moles you have, the greater your risk for melanoma. Being fair and spending lots of time in the sun (even if you only did so in your youth) raises your risk, as does every single sunburn. “If you have lots of sun damage, like freckles, you have a higher risk too,” Brodell says.

WHEN TO ACT: “Call your dermatologist as soon as you notice something unusual and say, ‘I have a changing mole, and I’m worried about it.’ She should get you in within a week or two,” Brodell says. If you don’t have a dermatologist, ask your doctor for a referral. The dermatologist should check your whole body for signs of skin cancer and biopsy anything that looks suspicious. “Fortunately, when melanoma is caught early it’s very curable,” Brodell says. To protect your skin, apply a broad spectrum sunscreen with at least SPF 30 every day, have full-body screenings annually, and check your body for new or changing moles once a month.

The Symptom: Trouble Finding the Right Words
Likely Cause: Sleep deprivation

Worst-Case Scenario: Stroke
It’s easy to laugh off a little brain freeze as a senior moment, but if your word problems amount to more than a minor slipup (for example, saying “runny hosted peanuts” instead of “honey roasted peanuts” is normal; saying “red place mat” when you mean “honey roasted peanuts” is not), it could be a stroke, which occurs when a blood vessel in the brain either bursts or is blocked by a clot, depriving brain cells of oxygen. “Language impairment —when you have trouble speaking, or say nonsense words or words that don’t go together—is common in left hemisphere strokes,” says Argye Hillis, MD, of the Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine.

OTHER SIGNS IT MAY BE SERIOUS: Weakness on one side of the body, slurred speech, dizziness, blurred vision, headache, neck stiffness or lack of coordination are all red flags. A temporary bout of amnesia (not being able to remember what you did for the past few hours) or symptoms that last only a few minutes could signal a transient ischemic attack (TI A), a ministroke that raises your risk of the real deal substantially, especially over the following few days. Certain factors raise your odds of having a stroke: getting migraines with an aura; smoking; being overweight; having heart disease, diabetes or high blood pressure; and being on the Pill or HT.

WHEN TO ACT: “Call 911 if any of these symptoms develop suddenly—for example, if you’re not able to do something that you could do five minutes earlier,” Hillis says. A quick response is critical, because receiving a clot busting drug within the first three hours improves the odds of recovery by an estimated 30 percent. “Even if symptoms go away on their own, you should get to the emergency room as soon as possible to be evaluated for the cause of the TI A, so a stroke can be prevented,” Hillis recommends.

The Symptom: Bloating and Pelvic Pain
Likely Cause: Gastrointestinal bug
Worst-Case Scenario: Ovarian cancer
Several medical groups, including the American Cancer Society, warned in 2007 that bloating and pelvic pain can be early signs of ovarian cancer— big news, since doctors have long believed that this often deadly disease is symptomless until it’s too advanced to treat. “If caught early, ovarian cancer is up to 90 percent curable,” says Barbara Goff, MD, of the University of Washington.

OTHER SIGNS IT MAY BE SERIOUS: Additional symptoms of ovarian cancer include feeling full quickly or having difficulty eating, urinating frequently or with great urgency, and changing bowel habits. You’re at increased risk if you have a family history of the illness, have tested positive for mutations in the genes BRCA 1 or BRCA 2, or have been on hormone therapy. (Your risks are lower if you have had at least one child, breast-fed a baby, taken birth control pills and maintained a healthy weight.)

WHEN TO ACT: “If the symptoms are new, occur almost every day, last more than a few weeks and don’t go away if you eat more fiber, reduce your salt intake, or exercise more frequently, schedule an appointment with your gynecologist,” says Linda R. Duska, MD, of the University of Virginia, in Charlottesville. Ask to be seen within two weeks. Diagnosis is tricky, so don’t be afraid to push your doctor for appropriate testing: a pelvic ultrasound and perhaps a blood test to check your level of CA-125, a substance found in high amounts in the blood of many women with ovarian cancer. Partly because the incidence of ovarian cancer rises with age, the ACS recommends annual pelvic exams for all women over age 40.

The Symptom: Burning, Tingling or Numbness in Your Feet
Likely Cause: A tight-fitting pair of shoes

Worst-Case Scenario: Prediabetes (elevated blood sugar levels)
Some 57 million Americans are prediabetic, but because prediabetes is often asymptomatic, most don’t know they’re on the cusp of serious
illness. (Without intervention, the condition typically progresses to full-blown diabetes within a decade.) Foot symptoms occur “because the illness damages the nervous and circulatory systems,” says John Giurini, DPM, of the American College of Foot and Ankle Surgeons.

OTHER SIGNS IT MAY BE SERIOUS: Some prediabetics may also experience tingling and numbness in the arms or hands, says Giurini. If you have fullblown diabetes, you may also experience frequent urination, excessive hunger or thirst, weight loss, fatigue or blurry vision. The risk factors for type 2 diabetes include being older than 45, being overweight, being sedentary, having a family history of diabetes, having gestational diabetes or having given birth to a baby weighing more than nine pounds.

WHEN TO ACT: If you have burning or tingling feet for more than a few weeks, call your internist and ask to be seen in the next week for a checkup and a fasting blood sugar test, Giurini suggests. Recent studies have shown that by losing five to seven percent of your body weight through diet and exercise, you can prevent the development of diabetes.

The Symptom: Persistent Cough
Likely Cause: A cold

Worst-Case Scenario: Adult-onset asthma, a condition that can worsen as women enter midlife.

OTHER SIGNS IT MAY BE SERIOUS: “If you cough only when you’re exercising or sleeping, that can indicate asthma,” says Vincent Tubiolo, MD, of the American Academy of Allergy, Asthma and Immunology. Other symptoms include wheezing, particularly when you exhale; shortness of breath; and tightness in the chest. Risk factors are obesity, allergies, smoking and a recent respiratory tract infection. “Women who have taken estrogen for 10 years have a 50 percent higher risk of developing asthma,” Tubiolo says. “And people with acid reflux are at increased risk, possibly because the acid irritates the airways and triggers an asthmatic cough.”

WHEN TO ACT: Asthma isn’t usually an emergency, but it makes sense to consult a doctor since the disease can be progressive (and even life-threatening when breathing problems are severe). Also, the condition can limit your physical activity and interfere with your sleep, both of which can affect your long-term health. Asthma is diagnosed with a pulmonary function test that measures airflow. “People feel a lot better once they receive treatment,” Tubiolo says. Reduce your risk by avoiding smoke, including the secondhand variety, and maintaining a normal weight.

Reprinted from More.com

Tech Essentials with Jane Applegate

New York, NY:  Small business expert and author, Jane Applegate, has teamed up with Microsoft’s Windows Small Business Server team to launch Tech Essentials with Jane Applegate, a new online program showcasing the best technology, tools, and equipment for growing companies.

Tech Essentials launches on Dec. 8, 2011 at www.myfirstserver.com.  Produced and hosted by Applegate, the new 20-minute program features interviews with experts and small business owners. Applegate and her guests provide insights and advice for making better decisions related to purchasing technology and equipment.

“Small businesses know that technology such as a Windows Small Business Server can give them a competitive edge. However, small organizations often need insights into how to maximize technology in their specific circumstances,” said David Fabritius, senior product manager, Windows Server and Virtualization at Microsoft. “We’re excited to see that Tech Essentials will give small business owners the information they need to succeed, on demand.”

Applegate is an award-winning author of four popular books on small business management, a producer and former syndicated small business columnist for the Los Angeles Times. She covers small business topics for OpenForum.com, Bloomberg.com, and PBsmartessentials.com.

“Thanks to Microsoft for providing an opportunity to produce a new, online small business program that provides timely information about the best technology for growing a business,” said Applegate. “Tech Essentials provides business owners and managers with the latest tools, technology, and information they need to succeed in today’s super-competitive business environment.” 

Ramon Ray, Smallbiztechnology.com’s editor and tech evangelist, joins Applegate as the expert on the first episode, which was shot at the Microsoft Studios. Ray produces technology conferences and is a popular speaker.

Tech Essentials also offers viewers an opportunity to submit their stories or share their technical expertise as a potential guest on a future episode. Viewers can also submit questions for Applegate to answer via email or Skype.

Tech Essentials with Jane Applegate segments:

 

• Tell Your Story:  Business owners share their best technology solutions

• Tech Trends Update:  Products and news you can use

• Tech Tips: Exclusive tips and strategies from respected small business authors and consultants

• Ask the Expert: Jane interviews technology experts

Prior to producing and hosting Tech Essentials, Jane Applegate created, produced and served as the national correspondent for Bloomberg Small Business, which aired on USA Network. She’s currently the leading small business speaker for Bloomberg TV’s “Idea Exchange” speakers’ program. She keynoted  15 events in 2011.

Applegate also reported for CNBC’s How to Succeed in Business and CNN’s For Entrepreneurs Only. The Applegate Group has produced a variety of small business programming for PBS, Lifetime, and ABC. Applegate’s daily small business radio report was syndicated on CBS stations for several years.

She’s the author of 201 Great Ideas for Your Small Business, a Bloomberg Press book published in all formats by John Wiley & Sons. Applegate is writing her fifth book about the power of personal contacts in an impersonal world.

For more information visit: www.myfirstserver.com and www.theapplegategroup.com.

 

Working from Home: A Survivor’s Guide

Working from home sounds like the perfect gig. What’s not to like about videoconferencing in your slippers, ditching the daily commute, and getting out from under your boss’s watchful eye? Plenty, actually!

Take it from someone who’s freelanced for four years, working from home may sound like a dream (all right, in some ways it is), but before you want to bludgeon me in my bathrobe, know that it does have its drawbacks. There are a few pitfalls that will have even the most independent and disciplined home-worker pining for a cubicle and looking for ways to cope, but these suggestions may help you get around them.

1. Make yourself presentable.
Yes, I have worn pajamas for entire days at a time. Yes, I have made it to two in the afternoon and realized I have not yet brushed my teeth. As a writer, these are occupational hazards. But anyone who works from home will tell you that the first rule of successfully working from home is that you must exercise at least a modicum of presentability. You can wear your bunny slippers, but you (and your postman) will take your work much more seriously if you’ve brushed your hair.

2. Go to your happy (work) place.
When I first started working from home, I would find myself wandering aimlessly from room to room. I had a home office; I just couldn’t write there. If you work from home, it’s important (especially to the IRS) to have a place dedicated exclusively to that. But don’t feel like you have to work there unless it works for you. My office houses my filing cabinet, printer, fax machine, books, and desk, but I work from my couch, my bed, and my dining room table. Find the place in your home where you’re most focused and creative.

3. Get out of the house.
If you think staring at the inside of the same cubicle every day is bad, imagine living in it. I’m just as sick of staring at my bedroom wall as a nine-to-fiver is of the beige burlap of her cube. If you can take your work with you, consider going to a café or the local library, even for a couple hours. Wifi and my local coffee shop have saved me from many a meltdown.

4. Fake an office.
The sound of silence can be deafening. The first thing I do in the morning (besides grunt at my roommate and pour myself some coffee), is turn on the TV while I check emails. I leave it on all day at a low volume. Sure, HGTV is not the same as coworkers, but it does approximate the low-grade burble of office noise, and it keeps me sane. Just keep the mute button nearby for unexpected phone calls.

5. Create your own water cooler.
Remember the cliché of coworkers gathering around the water cooler to gossip about other coworkers? There’s a reason for that water cooler (beyond hydration). A healthy work environment includes breaks for socializing. If you’re the sole employee at your “office,” seek out stand-in water cooler mates. Take a time-out to IM with friends, browse your favorite blogs or Web sites, meet a friend for lunch, or call your mom. The point is, everybody needs some good, old-fashioned, gossipy brain candy.

6. Leave the office—mentally.
When you work from home, you don’t get to leave your work at the office. You also don’t get weekends or holidays. I’m writing this article on President’s Day, when most of my other friends are reveling in their long weekend. I’m also writing it at night. My workday lasts all day. I might not turn this article in until 2 a.m. (Don’t feel too sorry for me, because I’ll sleep till ten.) Occasionally, however, you have to check out. Tell yourself “no work thoughts allowed” and stick to it. Even God rested on the seventh day.

7. Fight distraction.
It tickles me when I tell people I work from home and they marvel at my self-discipline. I thrive on deadlines and procrastination. I do have a few tricks, however, for keeping myself on track. If I’m working, I screen calls. (Sorry, friends.) If my task doesn’t require Internet, I log off. If I commit the morning (or rather, The View and Martha) to emails and Facebook, I’m less likely to find myself checking status updates every ten minutes in the afternoon.

8. Get a social life. 
If you don’t have work friends, you need real friends because working from home is a lonely business. I love living with a roommate because it gives me someone to pounce on when I’ve got a whole day’s worth of conversation saved up. Make weekday plans, not just weekend. A movie, dinner, a play, a walk—it doesn’t matter, as long as it keeps you from feeling like a work-at-home hermit.

9. Put down the Doritos.
You might think people who work from home would be buff. They can go to the gym any time and produce spreadsheets while doing twelve reps on the Thigh Master. You would be sorely mistaken (at least in my case). Because I’m on my own schedule, I always think there will be time for that workout later. Instead of a snack machine, I have an entire fridge and pantry to tempt me. (Not to mention a glass of wine that would be really nice around 4 p.m.) The fact that I wear stretchy sweatpants every day doesn’t help. Drag yourself to the gym. You’ll thank yourself.

10. Don’t feel guilty.
As someone who works from her couch, I am constantly defending my work ethic, even to myself. If I miss a call because I’m in the bathroom, I worry the other person thinks I’m out to a two-martini lunch. If I’m behind schedule, I feel like I’ve slacked off. I can only imagine what it will feel like when I have kids screaming in the background of a conference call. Remind yourself that your work may look different from other people’s, but it’s still work.

Of course there will be days you’ll envy friends who work in a skyscraper downtown or at a school in the suburbs. As they say, the grass is always greener. But one hassle-free midday trip to the grocery store followed by a matinee should take care of it. You’re checking your guilt—not your work ethic—at the door.

By Kathryn Williams, provided for w2wlink.com by Divine Caroline.

 

Women's Leadership Styles

As co-authors Sally Helgesen and Julie Johnson collected research for their latest book, The Female Vision: Women’s Real Power at Work, they noticed a trend: Women were leaving jobs that, at least from the authors’ perspective, looked desirable. They wondered why. “The women were all saying the same thing,” Helgesen recalls, “That it’s not worth it.” What did that mean, “It’s not worth it?” And why were talented, highly skilled women dropping out of the work force at a faster rate than men? To find answers to these questions, Helgesen and Johnson set out to quantify how men and women perceive, define, and pursue satisfaction at work. While they found many similarities between men and women, they also discovered, Helgesen notes, “a certain disconnect between what organizations expected and what women, at their best, had to offer.” For instance, Wall Street culture may not deliberately discriminate against women, but it may reject leaders whose values aren’t focused on money and power. “If you want that, you sacrifice everything else,” Helgesen says. “Is it a surprise that you end up with a culture that promotes the most greedy people?” Lately, much has been written about the benefits of leadership traits that are typically regarded as feminine (such as a collaborative, democratic approach that rewards rather than reprimands) and whether or not organizations whose leaders possess these feminine qualities are better off. According to Alice H. Eagly, professor, social psychology, Northwestern University, the answer is, “It depends,” she says. “I don’t want to say it’s not true. It’s slightly true.” In her book Through the Labyrinth: The Truth About How Women Become Leaders, Eagly and co-author Linda L. Carli, associate professor, Wellesley College, explore why the number of women in power remains rare and why their presence in leadership positions still evokes a sense of wonder. “It’s not a good argument [to say] that women have a better leadership style than men,” Eagly states, adding that it’s also not factual to say women make worse leaders than men. It is, however, accurate to say that women have a more difficult time towing the line between being assertive and being demure. According to “Diversity and Leadership in a Changing World,” an article co-authored by Eagly and Jean Lau Chin, dean, Derner Institute for Advanced Psychological Studies, Adelphi University, female leaders are expected to take charge – just like their male counterparts. But they’re also expected to “deliver the warmth and friendliness that is culturally prescribed for women,” the authors write. “Simultaneously impressing others as a good leader and a good woman is an accomplishment that is not necessarily easy to achieve, and common pitfalls involve seeming to be ‘too masculine’ or ‘too feminine.’” Twenty years ago, Helgesen published, The Female Advantage: Women’s Ways of Leadership. She wrote the book in part because she felt women were getting bad advice. They were being told, essentially, to leave their values at home and conform to the workplace. Women were finally making it into the executive suite, but once there, others had expectations about how they should behave. But meta-analyses of men and women’s leadership styles don’t show a dramatic difference between genders. What the data illustrate is that transformational leaders – leaders who stand for what’s good about the organization and behave as such, who are good teachers and coaches who care about their employees as individuals and who can inspire and motivate them to do their best, are optimal to lead today’s modern organizations, Eagly says. “To a small extent, women manifest these qualities more than male managers,” she adds. If that’s the case, why aren’t women being promoted as often as their male counterparts? “Women have something to overcome,” Eagly says. She blames the often small but insidious prejudices and stereotypes that women and other minorities must cope with. This is especially true in the corporate world. In its recent 2010 poll, only 28 of FORTUNE 1000 companies had women as their CEOs. “There are a lot of women doing a lot of leadership but in the corporate culture? Not so much,” Eagly notes. “It doesn’t make sense except by tradition – people tend to reproduce themselves.” Since men– specifically white men– hold the majority of executive positions in corporations, this tends to work against women and other minorities. Some corporations are organized more around networks, but many remain tied to a culture of position and power, and are run from the top down. “I don’t see large and powerful organizations making significant changes if the people at the top are blocking change or inhibiting change,” Helgesen says. “We need to expand how we define leadership – how leaders develop and how organizations do or do not take advantage of that.” An idea that’s gaining ground and “that’s good for women,” Eagly notes, is that leadership is ultimately androgynous. There is also a push to have modern leadership theories in corporate diversity considerations – not just of gender, but of race, sexual orientation, culture, and the like. “If [leaders] are from different social groups, backgrounds, and have the right training, they tend to be able to come up with more creative solutions,” Eagly explains. And if there is more diversity in a company’s leadership ranks, there will be a better understanding of its customer/client base as well. “There are a lot of arguments for diversity – not just in leadership style,” Eagly adds. Most companies have learned to make the business case for women in leadership roles, but they don’t always back up their rhetoric with structure and strategy, Heglesen says. She’s also disappointed in how few forums – internally and externally – women have to connect and share in productive ways. “Women have a capacity for noticing the details of human relationships,” Helgesen says. “There need to be ways of bringing that info into the strategic planning sessions.” Any employee who wants to be a leader and effect change is best served, Helgesen says, by honing those skills most valued by today’s companies – such as line management and international experience. In addition to a good skill set, potential leaders must also be able to articulate their value, make themselves visible, build “social capital” within the organization, and create a network of peers who will provide support throughout their careers. “Women have to understand what the criteria are for rising [in organizations],” Eagly says, “and figure out how to help one another to meet those criteria.” Reprinted from womenetics.com

Motivate and Engage Your Employees

Factors preventing employee motivation and engagement

Is it laziness?

Is it they don’t care?

Is it they only are there for the paycheck?

Is it that they don’t feel valued?

Is it they are not inspired?

I believe it can be all of the above.

Yet, if you believe as I do that most people want to do a good job, especially when first hired, something must happen to get in the way and sabotage employee motivation and employee engagement. I mean, few emotionally healthy people start a new job with the intention of taking advantage of their new employer. Most people want to contribute at a high level and make a difference in their professional life.

A study by Sirota Survey Intelligence in 2005 showed that in 85% of Fortune 1000 companies employee engagement “sharply declined” within the first six months of hire, and “continued to decline for years after.” With the downturn in the economy over the past couple of years, I doubt those numbers have improved.

Something must be occurring in the work environment that gets in the way of an employee’s motivation or desire to be engaged in their work and contribute at high levels.

If we start with the belief that employees initially want to do a good job, then other environmental factors must be influencing that attitude to change. What might they be?

How about…

• A lack of appropriate resources being provided (slow computers, outdated software, old desks and chairs, fluorescent lighting in the environment, etc).
• Learned helplessness from offering ideas, solutions, etc. that seemed to be ignored and never responded to…
• No one ever even asked for their input or ideas about how to make their job more effective, easier, less stressful or more productive…
• Being consistently micro-managed, showing a lack of trust and confidence

 

What would (could) happen if company leaders invested time in giving employees a real outlet for expressing their ideas for business efficiencies and improvements?

Historically, business leaders who think they’ve tried to initiate business improvement suggestions from employees (e.g., the dreaded and worthless “Suggestion Box”) haven’t gotten quality input. And, often they don’t receive any level of quantity of input, either.

A few months ago I delivered a keynote address at a company meeting with about 120 employees present. After I spoke the CEO asked everyone in attendance to notice a blank 3x5 note card at each place setting. He then asked everyone to write down one question they had for the company leaders that they would like to learn more about regarding the company. He said it could be about anything, company strategy, profitability, issues with their departments, etc. Less than 2% responded (2 out of 120).

Does this mean 98% of employees have no ideas, concerns or questions about the company they work for? Probably not. But, this becomes a downward spiral of employee dis-engagement. Employers receive little response when they inquire, so they stop asking.

This leads to the employees’ mistaken impression that the employer doesn’t care about them and their opinions. And this leads to the employer believing employees only care for the paycheck and benefits, and don’t want to contribute beyond that.

If they do try and engage employees more directly in meetings, often, they turn into a groan and moan sessions, and the leader becomes frustrated, reinforcing their beliefs.

These mis-perceptions continue to build developing low levels of trust, commitment and loyalty on both sides.

These mis-perceptions occur due to poor communication and poor process management. It comes down to the way employers, business leaders, bosses (call them what you will) ask the question(s), and in the way they have historically responded, which is usually in a way that is not supportive of on-going employee engagement.

Employers need to be the ones to break this cycle. Companies that have figured out a way to connect with employees by building a two-way communication flow of ideas and answers, have seen tremendous breakthroughs in cost savings, elimination of waste, improved customer service and even increased revenues.

Investing in people, engaging and encouraging them to create their own high-performance work environment will pay dividends for years to come.

 

Learn to Ask for What You Need

Requests are powerful.

Truly. While no one request is guaranteed to change the course of your career, business, relationships or life, any single request can. Requests have the potential to make a profound difference to the quality of your life and your ability to achieve the success you want. Sure, just because you ask for something doesn’t guarantee that you will get it.  But not asking for it does guarantee you won’t!  Would you really prefer the certainty of having your needs unmet over the possibility of having them met? Surely not?!

As someone dedicated to helping people fulfill their full spectrum of needs, I often find myself surprised at how few people actually ask for what they really want and how even fewer ask for it in ways that maximize the chances of getting it.  So I’m curious: Right now, as you read this article, what needs do you have that are going unmet and are causing you to feel resentful, frustrated and unappreciated because, whether you are conscious of it or not, you have not asked for what you really want?

Two Ingredients of a Powerful Request

For a request to hold any water it needs to specify not just a “what” (what you would like to have occur that presently isn’t), but also a “when” (by when it needs to happen). These are the “conditions of satisfaction” by which you and others can assess whether a commitment has been properly fulfilled. Asking for something to be done “soon” or “when you have time” leaves the door wide open for unmet expectations, frustration and disappointment.  It also doesn’t allow you to hold people accountable when they fail to do what you wanted.

You Get What You Tolerate!

It’s a rule of life that you get what you tolerate – whether in your relationships, your career or your life. Making more and better requests will go a long way toward eliminating the "tolerations" in your life. It may be making a request of your husband or children to take on an extra responsibility on the home front; your boss, partner or colleague to change the way they are communicating with you on projects; your employee to honor an existing commitment or even of your cleaning lady to stop hiding the remote control in obscure places!

Complaining about your problems never solves them; whining about unmet needs never fulfills them. People aren’t mind readers and assuming others should automatically know what you want or need is a surefire recipe for resentment.

Harness the Law of Attraction.

The Law of Attraction states that what we focus on expands. When you focus on what you want (fulfilled needs and a rich joy-filled life) as distinct from what you don’t want (unfulfilled needs and a life filled with "tolerations") and then take the actions to get it (e.g., make requests) your life can only change for the better.  So as you get on with the rest of your day, I invite you to think about what requests you could be making that you aren’t and then, start making them.  Don’t water down what you really want in order to minimize the possibility of being turned down. Rather be bold and ask for what you would ideally absolutely really and truly looooooove to have happen. If, in the end, you have to negotiate and you end up with not quite what you wanted, you’re still better off than before. At a minimum, you create a new context in the ensuing conversation, and even if it’s an outright “no” that comes back your way, at least now you know where things stand and can move on, plan and make changes accordingly.

Don’t Sell Out on Yourself: Ask for What You Really Want!

If you have big dreams that are inspiring you and big goals that are stretching you (which I sure hope you do!), then you need to get into the practice of making more, bigger, better and bolder requests! Asking less from yourself, from others and from life than you really want doesn’t serve anyone. Take responsibility for your experience of life and make the decision, starting right now, not to let another hour pass you by settling for your needs going unmet, your  frustrations running unfettered and your life passing uncherished. 

Life’s too short!

You are capable of more than you think – including making bolder requests than you’ve made up ‘til now. Don’t believe me? Then allow me to request you that you try … starting today! 

Written originally for w2wlink by Margie Warrell.

 

Lessons from 'The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo'

The best-selling book “The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo” and its sequels were made into films in Sweden in 2009. Now, the U.S. movie version of the first book, starring Daniel Craig and Rooney Mara, opens in theaters this December.

Women in business can take away many lessons from the title character, Lisbeth Salander. Strong, extremely intelligent and resilient, Lisbeth is a young computer hacker who has overcome many personal challenges in her lifetime to excel in her career.

w2wlink asked some of its professional experts and contributors for their thoughts on what female business owners and CEOs can learn from Lisbeth Salander:

From Lauren Porat, co-founder of Urban Interns:
While I’m eternally impressed by Lisbeth’s inner strength and resilience in the shadow of the terrible events that plagued her childhood, her computer and hacking skills also made a big impact on me. Programming tends to skew male today. Lisbeth’s confidence before her machine and the way that she uses technology as a defensive weapon will hopefully inspire more girls to get involved in tech! (Read more: Fostering More Female Tech Entrepreneurs)

From Paige Arnof-Fenn, founder of MavensAndMoguls.com:
What makes Lisbeth in “The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo" a strong leader is that she is confident, resourceful and wicked smart! She has a great balance of left and right brain, highly analytical and creative. I find her magnetic, passionate and curious — a great combination for successful leaders! (Read more: Leadership Keys for Success)

From Lisbeth McNabb, CEO of w2wlink.com:
The character Lisbeth in “The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo” shows such mental toughness with her ability to take an unfair life event and build a new path, though her initial tragedy may be more extreme than most unfair events. Yet many have had unfairness, and one thing I admire about the strong women around me is the ability to recover and build new paths. (Read more: Moving Forward After Losing a Job)

From Lauren Lemke, marketing and advertising professional:
In "The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo," Lisbeth demonstrates a resiliency that is crucial in the way she takes control of her adult life. The ability to become such a strong, independent woman despite being physically and mentally damaged speaks volumes to the strength of her character. Lisbeth's persistence in maintaining her sense of self throughout the novel is a skill that is crucial for women in becoming a successful leader. (Read more: 3 Questions to Determine Your Authenticity)

From Ryland Devero, marketing and social media professional:
Is the story of Lisbeth Salander your typical story of "girl power," or the empowerment of the modern woman? No, most certainly not. But that seems to be the hook in drawing the attention of a worldwide fan base that transcends gender, age and race. Lisbeth toes the line between apathy and activism, sometimes choosing to look out for only herself, and sometimes acting as a representative of a gender and/or class. I admired her ability to choose her own destiny and right the wrongs she experienced in her life. She fights for what she believed in and stands up for herself and for those who support her. Her strength, loyalty and dedication to her work are qualities that can be applied and mimicked in both personal and professional realities. (Read more: Rwandan Woman Encourages Empowerment at Women’s Forum 2011)

From Roz Mallet, president and CEO of PhaseNext Hospitality:
There are often no better lessons learned than those that require us to lead through adversity, and Lisbeth from “The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo” has seen plenty of adversity. None of us expect an easy path, and successfully steering through challenges with flexibility and tenacity teaches us how to stand up for ourselves and for those around us. Like Lisbeth’s character, I'm always building my toolkit for the unexpected situation around the corner. (Read more: Overcoming the Challenges for Women Re-entering the Workforce)

From Holly Murdoch, project manager of w2wlink.com:
Lisbeth Salander from "The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo" has great leadership quality and is a strong woman. She will work hard to get the job done and won't stop until there is a solution. She knows what she wants and will take the steps needed to be a leader for the task. (Read more: Are you a Guardian Leader?)